Real women don’t have hot flashes they have power surges - seen on a bumper sticker

Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words. - Doroty Parker

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

Can you imagine a world without men? No crime and lots of happy, fat women. - Nicole Hollander

There are three ways to get something done: Do it yourself, employ someone, or forbid your children to do it. - Monta Crane

Never lend your car to any to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

One can never speak enough of the virtues, the dangers, the power of shared laughter. -Francoise Sagan

There is something very powerful about...someone believing in you, someone giving you another chance. -
Sheila Walsh

Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home. - Phyllis Diller

Plant a seed of friendship; reap a bouquet of happiness. - Lois L. Kaufman

The only way not to break a friendship is not to drop it. - Julie Holz

Men are taught to apologize for their weaknesses, women for their strengths. - Lois Wyse

They say getting thin is the best revenge.  Success is much better. - Oprah Winfrey

Your goal should be out of reach but not out of sight. - Anita DeFrantz

Goals are dreams with deadlines. - Diana Scharf Hunt

Imagination is the highest kite one can fly. - Lauren Bacall

As God's workmanship, we deserve to be treated, and to treat ourselves, with affection and affirmation, regardless of our appearance or performance. - Mary Ann Mayo

Behind every successful woman...is a basket of dirty laundry. - Sally Forth

The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain. - Dolly Parton

If you want to see your daughter succeed, don't just teach her to add and subtract, teach her to deduct. - Joan G. Rosenberg

When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left and could say: I used everything you gave me. - Erma Bombeck

Success is often possible only with intense action accompanied by persistent will. Persistence is taking one more step. - Pam Farrel

There is nothing so kingly as kindness, and nothing so royal as truth. - Alice Cary

I am beginning to learn that it is the sweet, simple things of life which are the real ones after all. - Laura
Ingalls Wilder